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Nickrj’s rant for Wrestlemania 2

 

This event took place in three cities, the three biggest cities in the U.S. New York, Chicago and Los Angeles. It aired on April 7th 1986.

 

First we go to the Nassau Coliseum in Uniondale, New York.

 

Your hosts are Vince McMahon and Susan St. James.

 

Ray Charles sings a stirring rendition of America The Beautiful. The same version he did at the Super Bowl and at the World Series last year. The best WM version of America The Beautiful IMO.

 

Rowdy Roddy Piper talks about his boxing match with Mr. T, A funny interview. “Never will I shave my hair like an Indian and paint myself black.”

 

Opening Match: Paul Orndorff VS Magnificent Muraco (with Mr. Fuji)

Both these guys give overheard interviews at the start of the match. They start out by tying up a little. Muraco gets a slam but gets kicked and slammed by Orndorff. The fans here hate Fuji. Muraco backs Orndorff into the corner and starts hammering but gets reversed into the buckle, backdropped and armdrag. Orndorff does a drop toe hold and goes to the arm bar. Muraco takes Orndorff over but Paul hangs on. Paul continues to work on the arm on Muraco. Muraco does a nice fallaway slam and starts to take over. But Orndorff fights back. They both go out to the floor and brawl outside leading them both to get counted out at 4:32. Well this was pretty pointless DUD. The fans start a bullsh*t chant and rightly so.

 

Mr. T does an interview saying what he’s going to do to Piper in the boxing match.

 

Intercontental Title Match: Randy Savage (with Elizabeth) VS George Steele

Steele starts by going after Savage but Savage bails out of the ring. He does it two more times before Steele starts going after him. Steele catches Savage and starts biting his calf. This is just awful. Savage starts working back but gets caught in a high choke hold. Steele goes after Elizabeth but gets caught in the ropes by Savage. Savage hits a flying bodypress for 2 and Savage goes outside the ring. Steele throws Savage outside the ring and Savage goes underneath the ring and attacks Steele from the other side. Steele now starts biting the arm of Savage. Savage goes outside the ring and steels some flowers and uses em against Steele but gets bitten again. Steele uses the flowers on Savage now and then he takes timeout to eat a turnbuckle. My brother and I used to love it whenever he did this. Savage gets some turnbuckle padding in the face. Savage gets knocked outside the ring again. Steele gets distracted by Elizabeth again and Savage hits a double ax handle. Savage slams Steele inside and hits the flying elbow from the top which Steele kicks out of. Steele grabs the face and sends Savage into the corner but gets tripped by Savage and he pins Steele with his feet on the ropes at 7:07. Same ending in the IC title match at Wrestlemania except this time Tito Santana (whom Savage won the title from) is nowhere to be found. Anyways this match really REALLY sucked -*1/4

 

Gene Okerlund interviews Bill Fralic and Big John Studd about the upcoming battle royal coming up in Chicago. Studd shows what he’s going to do to Fralic by squashing a football.

 

Jake Roberts VS George Wells

Jake was a newcomer at this point. George attacks him before the bell. Jake throws him out of the ring but Wells throws him back in. Jake does a leap frog but takes a flying tackle followed by a head butt. Jake is whipped to the other side and George does a nice flying head scissors. Wells slams Jake and nails him with a right. George does a knee lift. Wells does a power slam for 2. Jake eye rakes Wells and slithers outside the ring. Wells chases him back in and takes a knee lift. Jake finishes it with the DDT at 3:05. Short but okay match *1/2. Jake then wraps a python around George’s neck and throat.

 

We get a look at the feud between Rowdy Roddy Piper and Mr. T on Saturday Night’s Main Event. Piper comes into the ring and challenges T and Bob Orton nails T from behind with a knee. We also get a look at them training.

 

Jesse Ventura interviews Hulk Hogan in Los Angeles and you can tell that these two sound pretty similar.

 

We get a look at the guest stars for the boxing match in New York. Joan Rivers is the guest ring announcer. Darryl Dawkins, Cab Calloway and G. Gordon Liddy are the guest judges. Herb is the guest timekeeper.

 

10 Round Boxing Match: Rowdy Roddy Piper (with Lou Duva and Cowboy Bob Orton) VS Mr. T (with Joe Frazier and the Haiti Kid)

This is a feud that pretty much dates back to Wrestlemania. Piper was a boxer back in the old days and he wanted to see if Mr. T can live up to what he did in Rocky III as the vicious Clubber Lang.

 

Round 1:

The bell rings and Piper starts by hitting a couple of jabs. T tries the midsection. They both tie up and the ref breaks it. They both tie up again and Piper tries a cheap shot. T backs Piper into the corner and the ref breaks it. Piper starts to take control but T hits a good one. Piper is trying everything to hit T now. Piper hits a couple of rights and they tie up again. Piper hits another right and they tie up once more. The bell rings to end the first round. They still try to fight but everyone comes in to break it up. It was a pretty even round I’d say.

 

Round 2:

T starts by hitting some rights but the ref takes time out to wipe some salve on Piper’s forehead. T tries to hit some rights but the Piper starts to take control. T fights back and gets Piper in the corner. They tie up and Piper starts hammering on T in the corner. He is really giving it to him now and one big right hook knocks T down. Piper adds insult by pushing him off with his foot. T gets up by 8. Piper starts hammering T near the ropes again and brings T down at the bell he gets up at 4 and the round ends. This was Piper’s round here. Orton throws some water at T in the corner.

 

Round 3:

Piper starts the Ali shuffle. He hits some jabs but T start fighting back. T starts hammering Piper in the corner and nearly knocks Piper down. T comes back with some more shots and knocks Piper down in the corner. Piper gets up at 7. They trade some punches before T hits a huge left that knocks Piper out of the ring. Piper gets back in the ring at 9. T drags Piper back into the corner again but the bell rings to end the round. T evens this match up here. Piper throws his chair at T before the bell.

 

Round 4:

Both men are trading huge punches. Piper hits one that knocks T’s mouthpiece out and T does the same. They tie up in the corner and the ref gets shoved down and Piper slams T drawing the DQ at 1:17 into the 4th round and Mr. T is the winner. Pretty good boxing match until the end. **3/4

 

Now we move to the Rosemont Horizon in Chicago Illinois

 

Your hosts are Gorilla Monsoon, Gene Okerlund, and Cathy Lee Crosby

 

Women’s Title Match The Fabulous Moolah VS Velvet McIntyre

Moolah attacks Velvet at the bell and really wallops her. Velvet comes back with a leap frog and a one foot dropkick. Velvet hits an elbow and a slam but misses a splash from the 2nd rope and Moolah gets the pin at :58. Very short but very quick ¼*

 

The Flag Match Nikolai Volkoff (with Fred Blassie) VS Corporal Kirchner

The winner of the match get to raise the flag of his country. Volkoff hits a spinning knee and throws him outside the ring he rams in face into the post and bites him. He rams Kirchner into the post again and he does a blade job with Blassie taunting him. Kirchner starts to take control inside the ring but he inadvertanly nails the ref and both men beat on each other but Blassie throws the cane in the ring but Kirchner intercepts it, nails Volkoff with it and gets the pin at 1:35. What’s with these quick matches all of a sudden? DUD.

 

20 Man Over The Top Rope Battle Royal

Gene Okerlund is the ring announcer and he explains the rules. 20 men begin in the ring and elimination occurs whenever someone is thrown over the top rope and both feet have to hit the floor. The man left standing alone in the ring is the winner. This one also features some NFL players. Claire Peller (who asks “Where’s The Beef?” in the Wendy’s commercials) is the Guest Timekeeper. NFL greats Dick Butkus (former Chicago Bear) and Ed “Too Tall” Jones (Dallas Cowboys) are guest referees.

 

The participants are Jimbo Covert, (Chicago Bears Offensive Tackle who gets a good hometown pop. This was three months after the Bears won the superbowl.) Pedro Morales, Tony Atlas, Ted Arcidi, Harvey Martin (former Dallas Cowboy who died last year) Dan Spievy, Hillbilly Jim, King Tonga, The Iron Sheik (with huge heat) Ernie Holmes (Pittsburgh Steelers) The Killer Bees (B. Brian Blair and Jumping Jim Brunzell) Big John Studd, Bill Fralic (Atlanta Falcons, The 1985 NFL Rookie Of The Year) The Hart Foundation (Bret Hart and Jim Neidhart) Russ Francis (San Francisco 49ers) Bruno Sammartino, William “The Refrigerator” Perry (Chicago Bears and he gets a huge ovation.) and Andre The Giant. Ernie Ladd is doing color commentary here. Now to the match.

 

3 or 4 guys try to get Perry out first. Covert comes in and tries to protect his teammate but he and Tonga get dumped out by Bill Fralic. Studd and Atlas try to get Perry now. Francis is almost elminated. Ernie Holmes is dumped by Sammartino. Andre and Studd go in the corner a rematch from last year. Andre tries to get Fralic out. Brunzell is dumped out by Neidhart. Perry dumps Tony Atlas. He goes after Studd in the corner. Harvey Martin runs into Andre and is stunned. Studd is hammering Perry now. Morales and Martin elimnate each other. Blair is almost dumped by Arcidi. And Arcidi is dumped by 4 guys. Spievy is dumped by the Sheik. And the Sheik also dumps Jim. Fralic is dumped by Big John Studd. Sammartino eliminated the Sheik. Down to about 7 men. Studd eliminates Sammartino. The Hart Foundation does a double hip toss but he gets up and sends both Hart over the top (but not out). Perry goes after Studd and hits a tackle but Studd blocks another and dumps Perry out. Perry offers a handshake and Studd accepts but he is pulled out by Perry. Down to four men. The Harts tie up Andre in the ropes with a double dropkick and Francis tries to get away but the Harts double team him and dump Francis out. The Harts double team Andre. Neidhart hits a tackle in the corner. Hart tries another but gets kicked. Andre grabs Neidhart by the beard and does a double noggin knocker. He kicks Neidhart out and Bret tries to climb the top rope but he’s caught and dumped out on top of Neidhart at 9:09 and Andre is the winner. Pretty good battle royal here **1/2

 

Vince and Susan in New York interview Piper about the boxing match and he doesn’t care what he did in the match.

 

Gene Okerlund interviews Jimbo Covert who says he got cheated and the Iron Shiek who doesn’t care about how well he did.

 

Tag Team Title Match: The Dream Team (Greg Valentine and Brutus Beefcake with Johnny Valiant) VS The British Bulldogs (Dynamite Kid and Davey Boy Smith with Capt. Lou Albano and Ozzy Ozbourne)

There are two referees outside the ring for this one. Smith starts out with Valentine and Smith shoves Greg down. Greg hits a couple of elbows but Smith comes right back. Greg misses an elbow but he gets an armdrag and misses another elbow. Dynamite comes in and starts working on Valentine. Valentine does a snap suplex and tags Smith. Smith goes for a suplex but Valentine blocks it and tries to reverse it but gets Vertical Suplexed for 2. Valentine goes outside to clear his head a little. Valentine works on Smith into the corner and starts to take control. Beefcake comes in for the first time and starts working on the arm but he gets press slammed. Dynamite comes back in and hits a clothesline and a knife edge for 2. A small package gets another 2. Smith comes back in and does a cradle suplex for 2. Beefcake is able to tag Valentine who hits a double ax handle followed by a suplex for 2. Smith makes a blind tag and Dynamite starts hammering Valentine in the corner. Smith comes back in and so does Dynamite for a double team for 2. Beefcake comes in illegally and helps Valentine takes advantage. Dynamite gets a sunset flip for 2. Dynamite hits a back breaker and Beefcake breaks the count. Dynamite hits a knee drop for 2. Valentine hits a couple of right hands and tries a pile driver and hits it for 2. Valentine tries to keep Dynamite’s shoulder’s down but gets kneed. Valentine goes to the top and gets slammed by Dynamite. A four way brawl erupts as Dynamite slams Valentine but he rolls outside. Valentine nails Dynamite outside. Smith comes back in and hits his running powerslam but only gets 2. Smith hits a suplex for another 2. Valentine sends Smith shoulder first into the post. Valentine goes to work on the arm and tags Beefcake who hits an elbow from the 2nd rope followed by a back slam. Valentine comes back in and hits a 2nd rope elbow followed by a shoulderbreaker for 2 but he picks him up. Valentine gets thrown into the corner knocking Dynamite off the apron and Smith gets the pin at 12:01 and the Bulldogs are the new tag team champions! This is the best match of the night ***1/2.

 

Finally we go to the Sports Arena in Los Angeles California

 

Your hosts are Jesse Ventura, Lord Alfred Hayes and Elvira

 

Ricky Steamboat VS Hercules Hernandez

Hercules was also a newcomer at this point and he has a afro hairstyle. He attacks Steamboat to start. Steamboat does 2 baseball slides to take advantage and does a couple of nice armdrags. He works on the arm. He comes out of a suplex and nails Hercules and does another armdrag. Ricky continues to work on the arm. Hercules does a shot but Steamboat does a couple of leapfrogs followed by an elbow. Steamboat hits a suplex. Hercules rams Ricky into the corner to take advantage. He drops Steamboat throat first into the top rope. Steamboat starts to fight back and tries to slam Herc but Herc falls on top for 2. Hercules hits a series of elbows for 2. Steamboat comes back with some chops but takes a clothesline for 2. Hercules does a press slam followed by another one. Hercules goes to the top and takes a knee on the way down. Steamboat goes to the top and hits his flying bodypress for the pin at 7:34. This match was a little slow at times *3/4

 

Uncle Elmer VS Adrian Adonis (with Jimmy Hart)

Oh boy here’s a good one. Adonis is wearing a long dress and a bow on his head. Elmer nails Adonis and sends him outside the ring with a couple of shots. Elmer hits another right and Adonis hits the post and goes outside again. Elmer tears up the dress and sends him back in the ring. He knocks him inside the ropes. Adonis comes back with a right hand but Elmer hits an avalanche but misses a legdrop. Adonis hits a splash on the top rope for the pin at 3:03. At least it was reasonably short DUD.

 

Lord Alfred Hayes does another interview with Hulk Hogan. Why does he get two interviews?

 

Tito Santana and The Junkyard Dog VS Terry and Hoss Funk (with Jimmy Hart)

Tempers start to flare as the JYD and Santana clear the ring of both Funks. Hoss starts the match with JYD and Hoss works on JYD but he throws Hoss into Terry and slams both Funks and it turns into a four way brawl already. Santana comes in and so does Terry. Funk starts nailing some chops but he gets clotheslined over the top rope and Santana nails some dropkicks on Hoss. JYD comes back in and he starts hammering Funk’s head into the turnbuckle. JYD hits a headbutt for 2. He throws Terry outside the ring again. Hoss comes in and so does Tito. Hoss hits a knee to take control. Santana hits the flying elbow for 2. Santana and Hoss do a criss cross but Terry hits Tito from behind. Terry throws Tito outside the ring and Jimmy gets a cheapshot. JYD helps Santana back in the ring. Terry hits a vertical suplex for 2. He tries another suplex but Santana reverses it. Both men collide and Hoss is able to tag. Hoss does a double arm suplex for 2. Santan starts to fight back but Hoss brings him back. Terry comes back in and a double clothesline occurs. A legdrop gets 2. Terry misses another legdrop and Santana tries to tag but gets headbutted. But he makes it back to his corner and JYD starts going to town on both Funks. He hits a clothesline on Terry and hits Hoss outside. JYD backdrops Terry to the outside. JYD slams Terry on a table as Santana works on Hoss. JYD nails Jimmy Hart inside. JYD does a small package and another four man brawl and Santana hooks the figure four but he gets ushered out. Terry uses the megaphone on JYD to get the pin at 11:42. Good type brawling match ***.

 

We get a look at the feud between Hulk Hogan and King Kong Bundy. Bundy injures Hogans ribs on Saturday Night’s Main Event with 3 avalanches and 2 splashes we also look at the training of Hogan with taped ribs. Bundy and Bobby Heenan then proceed to do a long interview.

 

We get a look at the guest stars for the main event. Tommy Lasorda is the guest ring announcer. The guest timekeeper is Ricky Schroder (who is booed!) The guest referee is Robert Conrad.

 

WWF Title Steel Cage Match: Hulk Hogan VS King Kong Bundy (with Bobby Heenan)

The first man to exit the cage either over the top or through the door with both feet hitting the floor is the winner. Hogan has taped ribs. They tie up and trade rights and lefts. Hogan takes advantage. He chokes out Bundy with the shoulder strap. Hogan continues to work on Bundy in the corner. Bundy takes advantage by hitting the injured ribs of Hogan. Bundy give a big slam and pushes Hogan’s face into the mat. Bundy tries to get out the door but is caught. Bundy drives Hogan back first into the cage and tries to go out the door again but is caught again. Bundy takes off the tape on Hogan’s ribs and chokes him out with it. He ties Hogan into the ropes with the tape and tries to go out again but Hogan somehow frees himself and stops Bundy. Hogan starts to take control now. He slams him headfirst into the cage and Bundy does a pretty good blade job. Hogan starts driving rights into Bundy’s busted face. He slams him into the cage again. He chokes out Bundy using the top rope and his foot. Hogan goes for a slam but Bundy falls on top. Bundy tries getting out through the door but Hogan takes the tape and chokes Bundy out with it. Bundy goes to the eyerake and hits the avalanche in the corner followed by a big splash. Bundy tries to get out the door one more time, but Hogan grabs Bundy’s leg. Bundy goes to the injured ribs again and hits another avalanche but it has no affect. Hogan then power slams Bundy and hits the legdrop and says he coming out. He climbs out over the top and Heenan tries to stop him while Bundy grabs him from behind but Bundy gets kicked off Hogan climbs over the other side while Bundy goes for the door. Hogans drops off first at 10:12 to win the match. Pretty mediocre match *1/4. Hogan locks Heenan in the cage and beats on him for fun.

 

Summary: Well this Wrestlemania pretty much reeked. A pretty boring show with mostly bad matches. A few good ones can’t save this one. RECOMMENDATION TO AVOID.